Directory:Rockdawgs

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Revision as of 19:46, 22 March 2009 by Earl (talk | contribs) (New page: 250px|right|The Rockdawg logo == Rockdawgs == The '''Rockdawgs''' are an elite team of athletes, mainly involved in the sport of drinking. However, the '''Rockdaw...)
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The Rockdawg logo

Rockdawgs

The Rockdawgs are an elite team of athletes, mainly involved in the sport of drinking. However, the Rockdawgs delve into other sports, notably co-ed 3-pitch baseball, and both mens and womens hockey teams. Currently, the team is looking into movie deals as well as some major sponsorship deals as they continue to party it up.

The Rockdawgs are also quite prominent participants in some other obscure pasttimes. [1] at the University of Guelph involves some members of the Rockdawgs showing ducks, flipping RockyRoad Rockdawgs pancakes, or participating in the ever messy Super Thursday event.

Currently, the Rockdawgs organization is headquartered in Guelph, Ontario. The owners call themselves members of Failurehouse, which is the name of the head office and training grounds. Failurehouse stems its name from one of the founding member's mothers, who shall remain nameless. A note was written regarding the head office, and as it turns out, hilarity ensued. To amend her self-proclaimed wrongs, an I'm Sorry cake was delivered to Failurehouse and consumed in record time.

Hockey

The Rockdawgs Organization

The Rockdawg men's hockey team was formally established in January 2007, but planning began weeks prior to this date. At some unknown point in time, the 4 founding fathers, namely Earl, Eddie, Pirate, and Timmer were sitting around drinking and happened upon the notion of founding the world's greatest hockey team. The Rockdawgs became formally registered to the University of Guelph Athletics Intramural program around this same date.[2] The first season was relatively successful, with the Rockdawgs achieving their first ever win. Jerseys were obtained later in the year, and were not available for the winning game. Despite their losing record, the men's team made it to the first round of playoffs and suffered a heart-breaking loss, ending their post-season dreams.

The Rockdawg women's team came about in the fall semester of 2007, after seeing the success of the men's team. The women have shown their prowess isn't just in looks, they can play hockey as well, getting all the way to the first round of playoffs in their initial season as well, only to be swept in a one-game series that was quite heartbreaking.

Team records may seem dismal to some, although when moral victories are taken into account, the Rockdawgs records improve dramatically. Current estimates for the men's team all-time is a shaky 1-28-3, with a playoff record of 0-3. The women's team has fared well in recent months, recording 2 back-to-back wins (a franchise record) and estimates put the women's team at a record of 3-18-5, with 2 additional playoff losses. While these records tell part of the story, it is the moral victories that really give insight to the extent of the hockey seasons. All-time including playoffs, the men's record is estimated to be at around 28-2-5, while the women's record is an estimated 24-2-2.

Both Rockdawg teams currently hold stake to the championship, as they play in different leagues. However, recently the idea was put forward by both teams to have a season-ending tournament to find the ultimate victor of Failurehouse and the ultimate power. The much sought-after championship trophy is called the Lucky Cup modeled after the Stanley Cup for the NHL. This trophy was constructed with Lucky cans in early 2008 by Timmer with help from Earl, who helped in the general consumption and preparation of the beer cans for fitting. Since its creation, it has been involved in many championship games for the Rockdawgs, and is one of the favourite pieces of hardware and admiration in Failurehouse.

Currently, both teams have a hoot on and off the ice, and will continue to do so in the future.


Other sports

Rockdawgs are involved in other sports, although hockey is centre of concentration. 3-pitch softball is an area of importance in the late summer months for the Rockdawgs. On-field success has been limited for the co-ed team, although moral victories again play an important role in the spirit of the team. Estimates put the official records at a 0-15-1 record, with the tie coming in the franchise's opening game. The moral record is much closer to 1.000, standing at about 15-1. Rockdawgs generally practice in the park down the road from Failurehouse, and have a hoot with softball as well.

The College Royal duck show is a popular spectator event for the Rockdawgs, as two members compete annually. Earl and Euphemia are consistent competitors, and don't go down without a fight in this exciting event. Their hard work finally payed off when they won the prestigious Reserve Champion ribbons for their showing of George Fernwell.[3]

College Royal also gave several of the girls, notably Debbo, Bailey, Wendy, and Kim a chance to compete in the uber-competitive pancake flip competition. The Rocky Road Rockdawg pancakes were flying out of the pans and Judge Walton agreed enough to award the hard-working girls a 3rd place ribbon.

Drinking

File:Das boot.jpg
We're better when we're drunk

This is where the Rockdawgs truly shine. With its beginnings long before the advent of the hockey team, the Rockdawgs have chosen to remain faithful to the challenges and victories that drinking brings along with it. Rockdawgs are known in Guelph for their abilities at competitive drinking games, especially in flip cup, beer pong, thumper, as well as general mass consumption.[4]

Rockdawgs are quite prominent at drinking events, especially at keggers, bars, and pubs such as Squirrel Tooth Alice's across the road from Failurehouse. It is not uncommon to walk into Squirrels and see one or more Rockdawgs engaging in some sort of drunken activity.

Beerfest is an event most revered by several of the Rockdawgs. Several styles of these drinking games have been played, either with a 2-man team or a 4-man team. Most Rockdawgs agree that the 2-man style is much better. The Lucky Cup is also used as a trophy for the champions of Beerfest. Two-time and current reigning champions, Timmer and Earl will likely continue their stranglehold on the trophy as Beerfests continue to happen.

The future of Rockdawgs Sports

With much of the team graduating, the Rockdawgs will likely bounce back next season with a co-ed hockey team.

No matter what happens with the sports side of Rockdawgs, the most important sport, drinking, will long continue into the future lives of these outstanding and heroic individuals.


Earl (talk) 17:23, 22 March 2009 (UTC)

Notes